Black Oak's Daughter

Everybody’s Free (To Wear Sunscreen)
I have seen this attributed to Kurt Vonnegut as a
speech he gave for a graduating class. I understand
this was also supposedly turned into a song.

If I could offer you only one tip for the future,
sunscreen would be it. The long term benefits of
sunscreen has been proved by scientists, whereas the
rest of my advice has no basis more reliable than my
own, meandering experience. I will dispense this
advice now.

Enjoy the power and beauty of your youth. But never
mind, you will never understand the power and the
beauty of your youth until they’ve faded. But trust
me, in twenty years, you will look back at photos of
yourself and recall in a way you can’t grasp now, how
much possibility lay before you and how fabulous you
really looked. You are not as fat as you imagine.

Don’t worry about the future or worry knowing that
worry is just as affective as trying to solve an
algebra equation by chewing bubble gum. The real
troubles in your life are apt to be things that never
crossed your worried mind. The kind that blind sides
you at 4 PM on some idle Tuesday. Do one thing every
day that scares you. Sing.

Don’t be reckless with other peoples’ hearts, don’t
put up with people who are reckless with yours. Floss.

Don’t waste your time on jealously. Sometimes you’re
ahead, sometimes you’re behind. The race is long and
in the end, it’s only with yourself.

Remember compliments you receive, forget the insults.
If you succeed in doing this, tell me how. Keep your
old love letters, throw away your old bank statements.
Stretch.

Don’t feel guilty if you don’t know what to do with
your life. The most interesting people I know didn’t
know at 22 what they wanted to do with their lives;
some of the most interesting 40 year olds still don’t.
Get plenty of calcium. Be kind to your knees, you’ll
miss them when they’re gone.

Maybe you’ll marry, maybe you won’t. Maybe you’ll have
children, maybe you won’t. Maybe you’ll divorce at 40,
maybe you’ll dance the ‘Funky Chicken’ on your 75th
wedding anniversary. Whatever you do, don’t
congratulate yourself too much or berate yourself
either. Your choices are half chance. So are everybody
else’s.

Enjoy your body. Use it every way you can. Don’t be
afraid of it or what other people think of it. It’s
the greatest instrument you’ll ever own. Dance. Even
if you have nowhere to do it but your own living room.
Read the directions even if you don’t follow them.

Do not read beauty magazines, they will only make you
feel ugly.

Get to know your parents. You never know when they’ll
be gone for good.

Be nice to your siblings. They are your best link to
your past and the most likely to stick with you in the
future.

Understand that friends come and go. But for a
precious few, you should hold on.

Work hard to bridge the gaps in geography and
lifestyle, for the older you get, the more you need
the people you knew when you were young.

Live in New York City once, but leave before it makes
you hard. Live in northern California once, but leave
before it makes you soft. Travel.

Accept certain inalienable truths: prices will rise,
politicians will philander, you too will get old and
when you do, you’ll fanatisize that when you were
young, prices were reasonable, politicians were noble
and children respected their elders. Respect your
elders.

Don’t expect anyone else to support you. Maybe you
have a trust fund, maybe you’ll have a wealthy spouse
but you’ll never know when either one might run out.

Don’t mess too much with your hair or by the time
you’re forty, it will look 85.

Be careful whose advice you buy, but be patient with
those who supply it. Advice is a form of nostalgia.
Dispensing it is a way of wishing the past from the
disposal, wiping it off, painting over the ugly parts
and recycling it for more than it’s worth. But trust
me on the sunscreen.

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