Black Oak's Daughter

I’ve been thinking a lot lately, and I think that I’m going to take a lesson that I’ve learned along the way in the business world and apply it to my life.

A while back, I met Bobby Rahal. He was speaking to the group that I was a part of about his personal philosophy and how it’s led to his success in business. Bobby Rahal was an Indy car racer for many years, and now he’s an Indy car owner as part of Rahal Letterman Racing, and he owns several dealerships throughout PA and OH.

As he was describing this philosophy that came out of his racing life he talked about how he won as a driver. There are times in a race when you’ve got a car drafting you, and cars so close on your left and right, that the only way to stay out of a crash is to Focus Forward. The first goal of a race is to finish, and to finish you have to go forward, generally for a set amount of laps/miles around a track. The key is to keep your focus on going forward for as much of the time as possible.

Paying attention to the guy behind you, or the ones that are trying to push past you on either side will not facilitate forward motion. Keep your eyes on the track, where the next turn is, where you need to be, and all of those things, and never mind (as much as possible at 200 mph) the cars around you.

Lately there have been a lot of things going on in my life. It’s frustrating as hell because a lot of it demands attention, but most of that stuff doesn’t put me any closer to my personal goals.

Last week I purchased a few things that will improve my life and help in the journey forward. Normally after making some big purchases like I did, I go through guilt for spending that kind of money. There’s excitement to the shopping and getting the best deal, and then that goes away once the items are delivered and there’s a let down. This time isn’t like that. This time, I’m proud of myself for getting the deals that I did, but I’m very much looking forward to having these things that will improve my situation enough so that I feel like I’m making forward progress.

I already have parts of the bed that I ordered. I put the memory foam topper on my old tired bed, just to try it out, and I should have bought one 18 months ago. I’m realizing just how much the uncomfortable mattress is contributing to my lack of sleep. There’s also a pain factor there with the arthritis in my spine, and the foam helps with that too. When the new mattress comes, I’m betting that half of my sleep issues go away.

The treadmill will be delivered tomorrow. Roomie is grumping about it for a couple of reasons. Depending on when it gets delivered, it may be in his way in the garage for a while, and his dolly is currently holding a load of wood, so that won’t help much either. I’ll do what I can, open the box and take the parts upstairs that I can carry, and hopefully he’ll help me with the big part. It won’t be in his way long. The other reason he’s grumping is because he doesn’t understand why I’d spend a lot of money on a treadmill when there’s a perfectly good sidewalk out front. Here’s an example of where I need to focus forward and not give his comment the power to derail my forward motion. Being able to get up in the morning, step into my home office where the treadmill will be, and walk a mile before I get into the shower in the morning, and then maybe again at night before dinner, will do more for me physically and mentally than almost any other lifestyle change can. My orhthopedic surgeon stressed how important walking is. My back is still as weak as it was 2 years ago when I had the surgery because I haven’t been walking. Walking is a core exercise. It keeps things toned and aligned properly. The issue with taking longer walks has to do with a problem that I haven’t told anyone about that I have with my feet. I can do a mile on a treadmill a couple of times a day. No problem. I can’t go out and walk 45 minutes without aggravating the nerves on the soles of my feet. This is a new issue in the last couple of years. There are a few things that could be causing that problem, but forgive me if I don’t want to deal with the any more doctors at the moment. I’ve had enough of them. Ultimately, losing weight will most likely make the problem go away. I’ve learned that I need to lead my weight loss efforts with exercise. So, I’ll just break the walks into smaller bits, and even if I do 15 minutes twice a day, that’s 30 minutes more than I have been doing. Focus Forward. Concentrate on what I CAN do and not on what I can’t do.

Here’s the progression of goals that I’m aiming for:
Getting a bit of exercise in (2x 15 minute walks minimum, 5 days a week) to make me tired enough to sleep well on my new bed. Being well rested, and working at exercising, in turn, will contribute to the motivation to eat properly.

Being exhausted all of the time definitely has contributed to my weight issues. Hopefully the better bed and the couple of walks a day, along with eating better, will change my life for the better. I’m not going to set any weight loss goals, but I will monitor progress and make small adjustments as needed. I’ve tried way too many times, to tackle all of the problems all at once, and get quickly discouraged when I don’t lose a certain amount of weight over a certain amount of time. I’m not going to set myself up that way this time.

I’m making 2 changes to begin with. I’ll be walking and I’ll be sleeping. The third change will come as time goes on. My eating has to be the third step to this change, and not the first step. Leading with “diet” is fatal for me. I can’t sustain a “diet”. I can sustain a couple of walks a day and between feeling good about myself for doing that, and not wanting to waste the effort, inevitably I’ll begin eating better. It’s NOT a diet. It’s tracking what I’m eating, and getting more veggies and fruits, and less of the “trigger foods” that I only eat to soothe my exhausted, sore, lonely self.

That sounds like a plan that I can sustain.

There are other aspects of my life that I’ll be tackling as time goes on too. The de-cluttering continues. My storage room is becoming organized. There are plenty of Garage Sales for charities that are coming up that I’ll gladly contribute to. The first one that I’ve heard of is in July. That gives me a month to get a few boxes ready. I already have one done. A couple more and the floor in there will be completely clear of boxes.

I don’t discuss the “Man Situation” in my life here out of respect for others privacy. In the past few months I’ve discovered a few things about myself that pertain to that whole realm of my life. I also spent yesterday with my best friend, and she gave me some good input too. I think my attitude about relationships is slowly getting back to a healthier state. I’m not ready to commit to anyone yet, I still need to do more work myself before that thought doesn’t terrify me, but I’m getting there.

In a lot of ways I’m getting there. Now I just have to focus forward and continue to make progress.

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